In this part of the globe, marriage is held at a very high esteem. Marriage is considered as one of the greatest achievements in life. Both young men and women are considered unsuccessful if marriage is missing in their lives. It does not matter how successful a man is, he is still regarded as a child in some quarters if he’s not married. A woman who is not married is viewed from different points of negative angle irrespective of how successful she is in life. Women are actually most hit by this belief since they must get married at a certain age after which the dreaded concept of late marriage sets in.
The level of importance attached to marriage by the society has caused many young women to run from pillar to pole, from counselors to spiritualists, from churches to shrines in the name of searching for Mr. Right. When a woman who is ruled by the belief that marriage is a do-or-die affair enters the period of late marriage, she becomes desperate and may relapse into depression. But is marriage really a do-or-die?
We have come to the sad reality that late marriage is actually a problem and as such should be tackled. Late marriage or lack of marriage for ladies has caused many families who once thrived and flourished in peace and happiness to live in squabbles. Many mothers even consider their daughters as failures because they’re not married.
Marriage, no doubt is a source of joy and fulfilment to many, and lack of it brings the opposite. Below are a few reasons some people get married late or don’t get married at all.
According to United Nations population gender estimate 2015, men are slightly more than women in number. For every 100 women, there are about 102 men. This implies that there is a husband for every woman on earth. However, this population ratio is not evenly distributed in the world. In some areas there are more women than men while in some areas, there are more men than women. It’s only a common sense that where you have more women than men, the case of scarcity of husband may arise. Other demographic investigations also show that women have higher life expectancy than men; and the female child has higher surviving rate than the male child. There’s also a higher migration rate for young men than young women. These factors affect certain areas leaving so many women unmarried.
2. Religious Belief:
It is pertinent to note that Some religions permit polygamy while others do not. A critical look at this shows that many areas dominated by Christians have higher rate of unmarried women because polygamy is not permitted in Christendom. On the other hand, it is difficult to find an unmarried young woman in a predominantly Islamic community.
3. Mismanagement of Relationship:
Most of the people who have the issues of late marriage were once in one relationship or the other. In fact, they are the ones who had been in many relationships in the past. Some of them had got involved with so many partners at a time that they could no longer make a choice. This is common with both men and women having issues of late marriage. Some of them had issues of commitment in relationships; they never put in any effort to make their relationships work . They would always blame their partner for all the faults they had. If you’ve had many exes in the past and you’re still searching, be rest assured that your next partner will become an ex unless you tell yourself some home truths.
4. Pride and Arrogance
Some people who have issues of late marriage are in it as a result of their attitude and character. Character defines a person and attitude is everything. Some young ladies are so arrogant that submission does not exist in their dictionary. They’re not patient, they look down on men who are not as rich as they think their kind of men should be. They never say “I’m sorry”. They’ll offend you but you’ll apologise to them! Such level of pride would chase away any prospective husband.
Late marriage could be a spiritual problem. Many may not subscribe to this, but it doesn’t matter if you believe it or not. The fact that I don’t believe in something doesn’t mean it does not exist. Parental and ancestral curses can actually rob anybody of his/her source of happiness which might include marriage. There are also the issues and beliefs about spirit husband and spirit wife; attachments to marine spirits and monitoring spirits. These beliefs have existed for many years and cannot be wished away easily.
6. Bad Aura.
Anyone whose aura is dirty cannot attract good things and good people to himself/herself. Marriage is all about attraction; and someone has to be drawn to you; he or she has to desire your companionship before you can talk about marriage.
7. Lack of Physical Value:
Some young people do not understand the concept of physical value. They suffer from social disease such as body odour and bad breath and cannot take any step towards addressing them. Some do not know what looks good on them; they wear anything and appear clumsy; they always look unkept and dirty; their self carriage is zero! These would actually keep a lot of people away.
There are many other reasons why marriage elude many people. They are how ever not worse pople than those in marriage. Some unmarried people actually live a happier life than those who are pushed up and down by the turbulence and the vicissitudes of marriage
whatever you believe, whatever you think of as the cause of late marriage or no marriage at all, it’s happiness that matters. Many are married but aree not happy. Just as we have many people trying to jump into marriage, so we have many who want to jump out of it.